Women Need to Know How to Shoot Flaming Arrows Too.

I really don’t think most women think of finding the Mr. Right by battling off crowds of men. I think most of the time it’s the complete opposite. But, when I read Song of Solomon I have a very epic, intense battle scene playing on repeat in my head. I see a small group of women shooting bow and arrows from a tower, popping their heads up only when necessary to get better aim. I see swords being swung, blood being shed, dejected men hobbling off the battlefield. Sometimes there are even laser eyes but that’s in the far more futuristic version of this picture. It’s so perfect in its scriptural value.

Song of Solomon talks a lot about marriage and sex but the bride specifically talks about protecting her heart up until she married Solomon as well. She talks about being a wall. The Bible might not portray it as drastically as I see it in my mind but the basis is the same: be a wall and build a battlement upon it.

“If she is a wall, we build on her a battlement of silver, but if she is a door, we will enclose her with boards of cedar.” Song of Solomon 8:9

As a woman who fears the Lord I value being a wall. As a fiancé I feel like I’m beginning to see even more how important it is. When you’re a wall you protect your heart. As women we have to be so careful who we give ourselves to. Our hearts are fragile, soft, and full of love. If we pass it out freely we’re doing ourselves a disservice and really not even letting men do their job. Women are to be pursued, protecting their hearts until that Godly man is brought to them. The bride in Song of Solomon says she is just this…

“I was a wall, and my breasts were like towers, then I was in his eyes as one who finds peace.” Song of Solomon 8:10

She was very particular about who she gave her heart to. She fought off all the pursuers who weren’t worth her time. Why do I picture something from Austin Powers popping in to my head with this verse? Her towers were her battlement though! The dictionary says a battlement is a parapet at the top of a wall, maybe a castle that has regularly spaced, squared openings for shooting through. This book is literally saying that they’re fighting these men off! This wall isn’t just a passive thing. It is a protection, a fortress, with very strategic openings every few feet to fire from. The others in Song of Solomon say they’re going to help her protect herself by going up in that battlement with her.

But unfortunately in our society today we have a lot of women who think it far better to be a door. They’re friendly with everyone, even guys who aren’t deserving of their wondrousness. Women who are doors aren’t careful with their hearts. They allow man after man to play hot potato with it and eventually break it into little pieces. This is not only sad but wrong. The others say they will board up women if they’re like this. They’ll protect her even if she doesn’t think she needs protecting. Women who are doors end up constantly getting hurt because they’re grabbing for something that’s not realistic. They want attention from all the wrong men and when they don’t get it they put themselves out there for anyone to feast upon.

God calls us to guard our hearts though! We’re supposed to battle men off not tend to the ones wounded from the women in the battlement. The bride says it three times throughout Song of Solomon:

“I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.” Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4

Solomon’s bride is loved, taken care of, in a Godly marriage and she wants women to wait for such a thing. She doesn’t want them to stir up love with just anyone. She wants them to have men deserving of their beauty and wisdom, their God-given foxiness. When you stir up love in my mind it really is like stirring something up, making yourself noticeable, talking with men, and starting to come out of the battlement even more. But this is only right if you, the woman, are being pursued. This is where the when it pleases part comes in. If this guy doesn’t actually care about you then he has no business stirring up love. If he isn’t asking you out on the dates and furthermore but just as important, paying for them as well, then you need to pop right back down into your fortress. When a man is willing to approach the battlement and respect the wall, slowly working his way in, that’s when love can be stirred. It pleases when the man is respectful, loving, caring, in pursuit of righteousness.

She even gives examples of how awesome Solomon is. Yes, there is a lot of sexual talk throughout the book but there are also more tame parts that still describe the relationship in such a beautiful way.

“I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, if you find my beloved, that you tell him I am sick with love.” Song of Solomon 5:8

“His mouth is most sweet, and he is altogether desirable. This is my beloved and this is my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem.” Song of Solomon 8:9

She is all about him. She misses him, wants to be with him. In these two verses she speaks directly to the daughters of Jerusalem again. She’s saying, ‘look, here is a great example as to how you should feel and some aspects that should be in your relationship.’

The Bride isn’t necessarily saying wait a long time to get married or even let a guy like you. She’s encouraging women to protect the beauty and grace God has given them. She’s saying wait for a Godly guy. Through this beautifully written book of Godly marriage and love this is such a clear message to women to protect their hearts until this man like Solomon comes along to take care of them correctly. It’s not that Solomon was perfect. He wasn’t. But he clung to God, as did she, and they praised God for what they had.

It can be so easy to try to push a romantic relationship with any person of the opposite sex. This is the exact reason as to why we have to be so careful. God didn’t design us to have more than one mate. The encouragement here is to wait though, because it’s so worth it. Rejoice in being a woman, in God’s creation that is looked upon so highly and pursued so readily by the right men. The encouragement is to take hold of your God-given womanly confidence and beauty and snipe out any men who miss the standards even by a centimeter. There is a man for you but God has called him to work for you first. So let him and enjoy being who God has made you to be!

Everything was pissing me off

It was one of those days when I got to take a deep breath for like, a minute, and then had to keep going very quickly. The past few hours had been filled with confusion, tiredness, sadness and even anger. The day was sucking.

Now, I could have easily taken this in to account and said, “Ok, God, it’s yours.” But I admit I didn’t. Instead I bemoaned everything, how customers approached me at work, how that guy poured the sugar in his coffee, how I wasn’t cleaning fast enough. I huffed and puffed around, sweeping with indignation, doing the dishes with many splashes, knocking the espresso out of the portafilter with just a little too much effort.

But then after several “This sucks” my boyfriend simply asked me, “Well, did you pray about it?” Maybe there was a little nervous cringe on his face because he was really trying to say, “Stop being a baby and whining so much.”

Walking around with my hands on my hips I prayed and God clearly brought it to my attention that I was being extremely selfish.

So, with a dramatic flourish of throwing my hands in to the air I announced to my boyfriend, “God is my only satisfaction right now because everything else is pissing me off.”

He laughed. I rested in this truth. As believers, God is our only source of true fulfillment and happiness. Everything else will piss us off.

Paul and the Corinthians had to throw their hands up in the air often. Paul is constantly encouraging them to take heart though. Yeah, this sucks, but only for right now. They went through trouble after trouble, pain, hardship, even physical suffering. But there was much hope.

God is our only joy. He is our perfect, righteous, loving, gracious creator. He is infallible. Everything else in this world fails. We’re all striving for fulfillment whether it’s through love, attention, or accomplishment. We can search everywhere and anywhere for this but God is the only way to truly attain it.

2 Corinthians starts off with Paul praising God because of the comfort he brings. He’s sharing with the people how he and Timothy were brutalized, to the point that they despaired of life itself (1:8). He says in the next verse, “But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.” Paul put his joy in God alone and even the toughest situations of getting beat up weren’t so bad because he had hope. He raised the dead before so we have hope that he will do it once again. Just like the Lord delivered us from the last horrible day at work and we woke up the next morning refreshed.

But it’s not just hope in God giving us great days consistently. There’s so much more to it.

“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light, momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

The world is infested with sin, so it sucks. People are corrupted because they’re not focused on God. There is wreckage within everything. These verses go beyond saying God is going to give you happiness all the time. They say instead that sometimes God is going to let your days suck to prepare you for eternity with Him. Paul says that we’re being prepared for an eternal weight of glory. Think about the term eternal weight. It must be so strong, powerful, heavenly and righteous that it pushes down on your spirit because of all the understanding and perfection we’ll encounter. This is where our hope lies. The things in this world are clear. We see right through them. This pisses us off. It’s what we can’t see right now that should be grasped on to so tightly. Since God is the only way to this hope we should grasp on to Him so tightly, with all of our strength. He will always be there while that job you hate, that person who rags on you, the way that cup sets on the table or the way the stranger poured their sugar won’t matter. And when we actually allow God to fill our hearts that anger melts away anyways. All of a sudden we find fulfillment and we end up serving God better. Instead of seeing calamity and brokenness we see opportunity to bring God’s light to the situations.

This is exactly what Paul allowed himself to do. God sent Titus to the Corinthians so he could see just how well they were doing. Paul was shown their zeal for the Lord so even though he’s throwing his hands in the air saying, “Ok, God, I get it. I get it.” He’s also saying, “I am filled with comfort. In all our affliction, I am overflowing with joy.” (2 Corinthians 7:4). Paul knows that God comforts the downcast (7:6) and he also knows that all this is worth it in the end.

God gives us one path to fulfillment. He doesn’t say choose path a, b or c and maybe you’ll get it right. He says he is the way and the truth and the life. If we want to try to control our lives by our works alone we will fail horribly. Anything that brings temporary happiness will become an idol. When we let transient things rule our lives and expect them to constantly attain perfection we end up overshadowing God. Life starts to suck all over again – we get pissed off. But if we let God rule our lives we find favor, happiness, blessing, love, understanding and the list goes on and on of what He graciously lavishes upon us because He loves us and because all He asks is that we live our lives for Him.

God’s love and grace for us is so vast and abounding that he takes us from unbelievably painful situations and shows us the promise of eternity with Him through the tough times. When we learn to endure, trust in Him completely, dedicate our lives to the only purpose that matters we have an overflowing fountain of hope. Life can be lived beautifully amidst death if we just hand our lives to Him.

So, with that, I throw my hands in the air.